Better watch out — yes, indeed, you’d better watch out, it’s that time of year and the big man is coming to town. Before you get all agog with visions of dancing sugar plums, let us open your eyes to 10 creepy things you might not know about Santa Claus:
1. Santa wears red to cover up the bloodstains from all the naughty boys and girls.
2. If you feed Santa’s elves after midnight they will turn into evil gremlins.
3. Before Santa got the cute little reindeer, he had a team of giant Norway rats.
4. If Santa’s so rich and famous, how come he’s always hanging around outside the grocery store looking for a handout?
5. Is Santa really an anagram for Satan? Has anyone ever seen what’s really under that red hat?
6. There are more Santa impersonators than Elvis impersonators — and they all want you to sit on their lap. Now that’s disturbing!
7. What’s really in that bag he carries, and where is Mrs. Claus?
8. Santa has more aka’s than the shiftiest of confidence men.
9. Since the elves formed a union, all of Santa’s toys now come from a sweatshop in Honduras.
10. He sees you when you’re sleeping — ’nuff said!
Discover the dark, disturbing side of Christmas at Cutting Edge Haunted House’s Nightscare Before Christmas! This one-night only event takes place Saturday, December 13th from 8 to 10 p.m. Get your tickets online now and don’t miss out. Because nothing says Christmas like a bloodcurdling scream!