The Zombies and the Evil Clowns faced off yesterday in Cutting Edge’s first ever World Cup Soccer Monster Match. In what will surely go down in history as the world’s most interesting soccer game, two well-matched teams took the field and let it all hang out.
In fact, play had to be stopped several times while officials removed excess body parts from the playing field.
With just 10 men on the pitch, the Evil Clowns found themselves at a distinct disadvantage, despite the Zombies’ clear lack of motility. The Zombies were the first to get on the scoresheet, with a powerful surge down the field that mowed down everyone and everything in their way. After a replacement referee was found, play resumed at a punishing tempo.
A foul was called against the Zombies when Zombie Midfielder Igor the Aggressor allegedly took a bite out of Evil Clown Defender Shaco the Demon Jester. The Evil Clowns won a free kick and used Igor’s head as the ball, firing a low cross into the box, goal Evil Clowns.
Despite the Zombies’ initial momentum, the veteran team seemed to crack under pressure in the second half, leaving fetid bits of flesh all over the field. Smelling victory, the Evil Clowns managed to rally and finish the game two goals ahead. What a disaster for the Zombies, who looked dead and buried at the finish.
It’s hard to describe the palpable excitement that pulsed through the crowd as the Evil Clowns did their victory dance on Cutting Edge’s “Back 40” soccer field, with chainsaws roaring, werewolves howling and the Zombie Marching Band playing a lively funeral dirge. Only in Fort Worth, Texas, at Cutting Edge Haunted House could such a remarkable grudge match take place.
The Zombies, Evil Clowns and the rest are just killing time, so to speak, till August 30th, when Cutting Edge opens its doors for a Sneak Peak, officially kicking off the 2014 haunting season. That’s just 61 days from now, so don’t hold your breath — yet, but do hold the date open and be ready for the scare of your life!
Keep checking back as we countdown to the throwdown!