A Face Only a Mother Could Love

MothersDay1

Yes, even Zombies have mothers, and Cutting Edge Haunted House in Fort Worth gives a special shout-out to all the mothers out there, whose darling offspring forever retain a special place in their maternal hearts, no matter how hideous, grotesque and utterly revolting they may seem to the rest of the world.

Some people cater to the belief that all babies are cute, but let’s face it, babies CAN be unattractive, and some of them are downright ugly, enough so to scare the fur off a tarantula! Worse, they can grow up to be really hideous adults, both inside and out. Imagine being the mother of a mass murderer, or worse, someone like Jeffrey Dahmer (for the record, he was adopted). Dahmer was a formiddable argument for the concept of nature over nurture, because he grew up with two very loving adoptive parents who positively doted on him. It’s just too bad they didn’t notice he was torturing and killing the neighborhood cats every time their heads were turned…

A mother’s work is never done, and sometimes quite thankless.

Lizzie Borden took an axe
And gave her mother forty whacks.
When she saw what she had done,
She gave her father forty-one.

Actually, Lizzie Borden was quite devoted to her mother, who died when she was just a child. The woman who received some 18 or 19 blows with a hatchet was her stepmother, and her father received a mere 11 blows, not 41. Although indicted for the murders by a grand jury, Lizzie was later acquitted at trial, and lived on in Fall River, Massachusetts with her sister Emma, ostracized by the community until her death in 1927 at the age of 66. Upon her death the left the bulk of her estate to the Fall River Animal Rescue League, so she couldn’t have been all bad. Whether it was Lizzie or someone else who committed the heinous murders remains a mystery.

On this Mother’s Day, Cutting Edge Haunted House salutes mothers everywhere; mothers of monsters, mothers of Zombies, mothers of axe murders and even mothers of politicians. It’s a dirty thankless job, but someone has to do it!