Shortly after midnight, the zombie marching band and the drum line got into a smackdown and there are drumsticks, instruments and body parts everywhere.
Santa’s evil elves got into the eggnog and proceeded to paint lewd graffiti all over the walls with DayGlo paint.
Some wascally wabbit went nuts and cranked up the bubble machine, and now the whole place is full of soap bubbles.
We’re not sure where the snakes are.
There are 13 cars left in the parking lot, so if you left without your car, please come back and get it. If you’re still here, please go home.
If you found a keychain with a skull on it that says Cutting Edge Front Door Key, please return it. We’d like to go home too.
And if you’re one of the people who have filed a missing persons report because a friend or relative hasn’t made it out yet, rest assured, we’ve got the cadaver dogs — I mean, sheriff’s deputies out searching the grounds.
If you had a great time, you’re welcome. If you left without pants, we’re sorry. If you’re still here, please go home.
We at Cutting Edge want to wish you a Very Scary Christmas!