Real Zombies of Cutting Edge

The latest reality television show to hit the Wednesday night lineup is MTV’s Big Tips Texas, filmed at the Arlington location of Dallas-Fort Worth’s popular restaurant chain, Redneck Heaven. The show is an inside look at the lives and loves of 10 Redneck staffers, who prance around in their Daisy Dukes spreading gossip, having cat-fights and basically just being girls. Texas girls.

Now, certainly there’s always room for another reality television show featuring scantily clad women behaving badly, but we can’t help but wonder, why not film a reality television show somewhere really interesting, like say, at Fort Worth’s iconic haunted house, Cutting Edge?

Imagine the excitement as a couple of enraged zombies go at each other with chainsaws, bloodless limbs flying everywhere while evil clowns shriek with delight in the background. What a heartwarming sight it would be to see vampires and werewolves painting each other’s toenails and doing each other’s hair, gossiping about who has the most powerful chainsaw or the longest staff.

But the best part of the show would be the customers’ reactions as they make their way through five floors of madness and mayhem, with ghouls and goblins lurking around every corner, waiting to pounce on their hapless victims. Over the years Cutting Edge has recorded priceless photos and videos of patrons squealing and giggling with surprise, shrieking with fear and basically screaming like little girls. Yes, the customers would truly be the stars of the show!

So who needs a bunch of “breastaurant” waitresses in hot pants when you could go behind the scenes at the world’s longest walk-through haunted house, sneak up on people and see them clutch each other in terror, squeal with delight and run screaming through the dark Texas night? Hands down, it’s the Cutting Edge by a landslide. Send your emails to the MTV folks, and tell them you want to see a reality show with a BITE to it!